I prefer not to think of myself as narcissistic, egotistical or arrogant (even though I know plenty of people who would disagree with me) but instead, maybe a little too self-aware. I think I'm pretty laid back and try to go with the flow as much as possible. Sure there are some things that drive me up the wall, but generally speaking I try to maintain my calm, happy-joy-joy, and more such Demolition Man-speak. I strive to be an honest, open-book that what you see is what you get. Real and mostly drama free. Selfless and deep. I hate shallowness. Non-snobby.
Oh, wait...that's right...I'm a total fucking snob when it comes to MY music.
I know, I know...it is ABSOLUTELY cliche' to say that you love all kinds of music. But I really mean it. I got everything from Garth Brooks to Frank Sinatra. The Gin Blossoms to Van Halen. Pearl Jam to Elvis. Will Smith to Sublime. John Williams to James Horner (geek reference, FTW). Seriously, I love all kinds of music. Except rap which can go to Hell in a handbasket, yeah I said it.
My iTunes stands at over 4000 songs right now. That's right, I'm gloating.
Boom bitches.
Now what to do with all my musical knowledge except share it with the needy, the less fortunate, the hapless drones circling the global net like yourselves! OK, maybe your not a drone...but I'm trying to enrich your life here so get with the program.
Right off the bat the first person that comes to mind is Schuyler Fisk. She's been in a couple movies and has a famous mom (Carrie) but none of that should concern you too much unless you get horribly fixated on her and start stalking her...then we have problems.
But seriously, this girl is truly talented. Folksy and artsy yes, but don't let that stand against her. She's awesome. Check her out:
She's also cute as all hell which is awesome:
CUTE!
Next on my pretentious list is gonna have to be the Civil Wars. You MAY have already heard of them, but who cares? If I get one more person interested in them I count that as a win. Again, VERY folksy.
I see a theme forming...
Theme or no theme, the Civil Wars are amazing and have a pretty unique vocal range. Their most famous song is actually one of my least favorite on their album, but it's still good. Which says a lot, I think.
See what I mean? Awesome. Buy their album. Very good stuff.
Finally, (yes this too like all things will end) I'ma go off in a different direction right hur.
Scars on 45 is possibly the best band I've heard in years. I know that says a lot, but I'm sayin' it. There are just some bands that are so good you only hear the song once or twice but it connects and hits so deeply that it's already a part of you and know it...WELL. Other than Dishwalla, this is the only band I've come into contact with that has profoundly interested me beyond words and descriptions. And they only have like four or five songs you can get through iTunes!!! If that's not an accomplishment, I don't know what is. Gotta give a head's up to my buddy Broc (my music muse and broham who always has his ear to the grindstone) for letting me know about these guys and gal in the first place.
I hope you see what I mean!
Well that's it for now, but more will surely come!
In case you were wondering, NO, you will not be getting reviews for Battleship and Men in Black III.
I can justify this while holding onto complete artistic integrity by stating that this site is NOT just a movie review site, therefore, I have no need to review every single shitpile that comes our way. This site is not beholden to the laws of a site that only covers movie news. The Batcave is deeper than that, stretching into the abyss below where lurks the darkest of foul creatures who stalk amongst the haunting quiet and a blackness that can only be compared to Deep SPACE!!!
I took that too far.
The Batcave is more than just a movie news site. I actually pride it on being much, much more than about the reviews I post. Sure, I cover movies AND movie news, but there's more than meets the eye here.
So no, I will not be posting reviews to Battleship and/or Men in Black III. Mainly because I won't be watching them.
Battleship is a movie based on a board game without a story behind it. I love playing Battleship, but I must have forgot the part where there are characters and aliens running around? Peter Berg was the guy hired to direct it, and while he's a great director (the Kingdom is a phenomenal movie), everything I've seen from the trailers tells me this is a stupid, stupid movie. I don't mind a bit of idiocy, but when you start insulting me, that's where I draw the line. I believe people should be above this sort of stupidity. Maybe that's an old fashioned notion, but hey, it's how I feel. We keep letting Hollywood sell us movies like this, how far are we from Idiocracy's movie of the year:
Gotta love the angry Carl's Jr. star...If you haven't seen Idiocracy, rectify that now.
Also, Liam Neeson FORGOT he was in Battleship.
As for Men in Black III, well it's this simple folks:
THEY STARTED SHOOTING THE MOVIE WITHOUT A SCRIPT.
That's endgame for me in terms of deciding if I'm seeing something or not. I gotta REALLY love the material to throw this fact out of my way. And while I LIKED the first movie, they dropped the ball on the second...I'm an extremely unforgiving man, and they don't get a second chance with me on this.
Not to mention, this is a TIME TRAVEL movie! Notoriously more complicated storylines are involved when penning these kinds of scripts. But hey, throw Big Willie in front of the camera and it'll make boatloads!!!
Well, I'm happy to report that both of these movies have MASSIVELY underperformed at the Box Office. This is excellent because it sends a clear message to Hollywood. Dumb, special effects movies do NOT equal success. Nor do so-called "big-names". The hand book they keep using is outdated and needed to be thrown out thirty years ago, and yet, they keep making the same goddamn mistakes. This is clearly an industry that has a problem evolving. Most of that lies in the fact that their horribly run businesses that should be art houses are being passed down to generation upon generation of imbecile with no talent for art OR business while the actual money-making talent lies continually wasted.
Sure! Of course a slightly dumb, special effects driven movie CAN be good and successful, but there's usually a damn good story behind the stupidity and even then the lack of intelligence isn't all that blindingly stark.
Battleship and Men in Black III are a waste of effort, money, and time.
I don't usually post this sort of thing because I don't really give a shit about celebrity stuff and avoid potential acts that could be construed as controversial - mostly because I just don't care.
But here is a celebrity behaving just as I would, and it's kind of awesome.
Will Smith has kind of been pissing me off lately, what with his choice of projects, the Scientology thing, and constantly shoving his annoying, untalented children down my throat.
But this makes me happy. It's hard to put it into words, but it just feels like this makes him more of a regular guy (as he's supposed to be). This act brings him back to Earth and makes me feel that all the hoopla is exactly that...just hoopla.
Whatever, either way, you gotta love his bodyguard's look at the dude as they walk away. You know he's thinking, 'that's right, bitch, you got handled and I didn't have to lift a finger.'
This is gonna be short and sweet. For one thing, I have another
larger article to write after this one, but also, I'm very tired after
my 9 hour shift as well as I have some more beer work to accomplish!
Many
times I have people coming up to the bar and asking for simple soda's,
water's, and/or tea's. Yes, if we're busy this makes me want to
physically hurt them. But if they're cool and we're dead, more than
likely I don't even charge them for anything (I of course make sure that
their server eventually does...heh). Often times I have a couple and
one of them is getting a legitimate drink while the other is getting a
soda. I go back and forth sort of depending on the vibe of the person on
whether I add the seemingly insignificant drink on to their tab.
But this is where things get sticky.
So
today I had this guy come in and order a Midori sour for himself (lame)
and a diet Coke for his wife. So I don't charge him for the Coke.
They're nice, they seem like decent enough people and we're slow so
whatever.
Eventually I get around to grabbing his
credit card slip and I'm about to enter in the computer the tip amount
when I find that the son of a bitch didn't leave me one dollar. Not even
one dollar. Personally, I come from a frame of mind that you give 2
dollars per drink. Most mouthbreather's give 1. But they're cheap and
most people, especially stupid people are cheap. So whatever. But here I
go not charging this guy the extra like $2.60 for his wife's coke and
he can't even give me a buck.
Well, never again. Now I'm going to charge everyone for everything I give them, simple as that.
And that ladies and gents is how cheap people ruin it for everyone else.
You might be asking yourself why is Community dead when it just got renewed (for 13 measly episodes) next season.
You therefore might be asking yourself why this is Part 1 of a death that shouldn't exist for said reasons.
Hell, the show was renewed right!?
To answer all of your questions:
DAN HARMON WAS FIRED.
Let me explain why this is bad...and why INDEED we are in the darkest timeline.
Community was a show about characters that we could all relate to. It was an insanely self-aware show that was all about love, respect, fun, happiness, family, geekiness, paint ball, selfishness, hate, zombies, teamwork, schoolwork, pop culture, and blah, blah, blah, fucking blah...except - COOL, COOL, COOL.
The show was about everything. It was fun, funny, sarcastic, and interesting above all things. Sure it was uber-geeky but, God was it amazingly entertaining. This was the show to love, people.
FOR EXAMPLE:
The following segment of an episode delved solely into the idea that there is a multi-verse (meaning that there are other worlds that these - I just scored ten points for a Dark Tower reference - FYI) where every decision we make can create a new world.
See? This show is GENIUS.
Sure, the following segment has subtitles, but WATCH IT!
The notion that was put forth in this episode (that was followed through with many episodes hence forth) was that there was a dark timeline, or as Abed puts it, THE DARKEST TIMELINE.
For a long time, I've felt that we have been living in the best timeline. Sure, Community has been on the ropes against Clubber Lang a few times, but we've always fought our way back.
In the last year, NBC stupidly put the show on a hiatus. Even though the show had episodes finished and committed (contractually), for some ridiculous reason (Hollywood makes tons of dumbass decisions - at one point in time, the WB had Tim Burton directing a Superman movie staring Nicolas Cage...need I say more? - NO, I really don't have to) they chose to wait to air them.
Most fans figured this was just a small (pussy ass) step towards cancellation. But then the show came back. VICTORY!!! Community was then henceforth renewed for another season (albeit only 13 episodes - but shit, we'll take what we can get).
We rejoiced!
Yet now? Everything means nothing.
Dan Harmon has been fired from the show...HIS show.
So while I believe there is a world out there where Community thrives, there is also a world where Community was cancelled. The greatness died.
I would take that.
It's absolutely preferable to what we are now faced with.
A world of Community WITHOUT it's creator. It's a slap in the face. It's horror incarnate.
Dan Harmon WAS Community.
I have small hopes that the show could continue at least as well as it's been doing and survive a year or two...but these hopes are grim.
The reality is that NBC is trying to be diplomatic. They are trying to avoid protest and aggravation. This is their way of slowly killing Community.
Truth: I honestly believe Erica Durance is EASILY one of the sexiest women gracing the planet. I don't even need to see all of the women on the planet to make this statement. That's how sexy I find her!
For those who have never heard of her or don't recognize her gorgeous face, she played Lois Lane on Smallville from Season 4 to 10. I'm a massive Smallville fan and I was an almost instant fan of Durance as Lois Lane. Not only was she beautiful and fit the part perfectly but she played it so goddamn well. In fact, she just kept getting better and better as her character traversed the Smallville world from College drop-out searching for her missing cousin to intrepid reporter for the Daily Planet in Metropolis. She was spunky, smart, funny, bossy, charming, stubborn, tough, sexy, and almost always WAY over her head in whatever situation she had fallen into. But she could also be demure, sweet, graceful, and very touching. She really was Lois Lane. At least the best Lois Lane thus far.
Add to this her amazing chemistry with Tom Welling's Clark Kent and you have a recipe for success, or do TEN SEASONS of television lie?
Okay so she was only on the show for SEVEN SEASONS, but still.
Annnnd maybe the recipe isn't just for success but for TONS upon TONS of fan-made music videos featuring Lois and Clark. Seriously, I'm not kidding, it was sort of a quest to find videos that might just show a mere taste of their chemistry through their actions and witty banter rather than through a montage of images set to a Sarah McLachlan or Lifehouse song. For a second there, I didn't think I was going to be able to have anything to show for this segment of the article. Luckily my search paid off a little and I found a couple clips I like that showed why Smallville in it's later years inevitably focused more on Lois and Clark than any other aspect of the show.
Besides her phenomenal work on Smallville, Ms. Durance has kept busy with spots on other television shows and movies. It should be obvious that she's a very talented actress and has a lot to offer. I'm surprised and a bit angry that Hollywood really hasn't come knocking on her door. She definitely deserves more work and should be recognized as the lady who played Lois Lane better than some of the higher-up actresses that came before and during her tenure (I'm looking at you Kate Bosworth).
As if I didn't have enough reasons to already be in love with her, I recently found out that she grew up reading comic books and was a Superman fan as well.
Damn.
Plus she looks great in a Wonder Woman costume:
She IS already married, but I'm not intimidated by that...okay, maybe I AM a little bit, but I'm still proposing here. Because how can you take a close look at Erica Durance and not think: Why not me? Gorgeous, smart, talented, loves Superman, seriously, where has she been my whole life? Where is MY Lois Lane?
Well I'm not sure where my Lois Lane is but Erica was born and raised in Canada...so this time we won't hold that against her. Heh.
I couldn't help it, I had to post at least one of those cheesy fan-made videos. Going through so many extremely different versions of them and searching for plain-ole normal clips straight from Smallville shows just how many nuts and/or hopeless romantics out there. Just search Clois on YouTube and you'll be astounded. Who are these people? On one hand it's kinda sad, but on the other sort of gives me hope. Eh, whatever, each to their own.
Of course looks can be deceiving, but this looks pretty darn fantastic.
We've got a great James Bond, a great director (Sam Mendes), a great M - of course - AND Q is showing up this time around...mix well with a pretty damn interestingly made trailer, well you've got all the ingredients for a good show, pardner.
Very excited for this. It just hits all the right notes. Tell me I'm wrong.
I've pretty much read all the Cross books (with the exception of the most recent couple) and have been avidly following the series pretty much since Morgan Freeman NAILED it with Kiss the Girls back in the day (my personal favorite of the series anyhoo):
However, Morgan Freeman was not entirely the perfect choice for Alex Cross.
Cross is most often described as a Denzel Washington look-alike - which I find fascinatingly ODD since Denzel never really ages and would've been PHENOMENAL in the role 20, 10, or even 5 years ago, not to mention, oh I don't know - how about NOW.
Needless to say, Hollywood wanted to "reboot" the Cross series and while Morgan Freeman is the effing MAN, he's definitely too old for the character now...and this is one of the rare cases where a reboot and a recasting is extremely welcome.
When the most recent Alex Cross project started, the production team first sought Idris Elba:
You know the man, you've seen him in Thor, Takers, the Losers, the Office, and the Wire. He's an astoundingly good actor who's done EVERYTHING. He's well suited for action and drama and he just looks perfect for Alex Cross.
ME WAS UBER DUPER SUPER EXCITED!!!
And then something happened. I suspect that either he asked too much for a salary or his massive schedule conflicted with the studio's shoot date. Either way, Elba was out.
Enter Tyler Perry...
No, you read that right.
Look, I'm absolutely not a Tyler Perry hater. He has his thing, his schtick, and he's been extremely successful with it. Good on him. It's totally NOT my thing but whatever. Now he's trying to branch out.
STILL, Madea himself was tapped to star as Detective and Forensic Psychologist Alex Cross. Family man, widow, boxer, piano player, lover of multiple women, and driver of a badass Porsche got relegated to Tyler Perry.
But here's the thing...they balked at Michael Keaton when he was hired to play Batman. We all know how that went. I'm of course willing to give this a chance.
Especially after some of these shots:
This is Matthew Fox!!! He's the bad guy in the flick...I know! Right!?
All of this makes me hopeful...but yet I can't help but feel just a tad bit apprehensive. The studio had an A+++++ ready to go on their hands (granted, in terms of casting) and now they have a pretty big question mark. So I guess we'll just wait and see.
Furthermore (full disclosure again), upon doing research for this article I came across an interesting interview which made me see that Perry is taking this role very seriously...so it'll probably turn out all right:
This is PRECISELY the sort of message that needs to be sent to Hollywood.
When you make stupid, utterly fucking bullshit drivel that is completely inane and mostly repetitive you should NOT succeed and make money.
Instead, the movie that was painstakingly mapped and thought out with a world that was created by multiple movies and then made by TALENTED people who were also ALLOWED to be talented (Peter Berg, director of Battleship is actually a talented guy - I'm saying he wasn't talented on this project) is ultimately the movie that absolutely should make tons of money.
Maybe now people in Hollywood will take notice.
Make crappy comic book movies and utter shite = NO MONEY.
Stay faithful to quality material and you win BIG. Simple as that.
I've said it before, I am positively sure I will say it again, but this has to be one of the coolest things I've ever seen.
These guys have mapped out (and then reenact upon visiting) all the locations in Ghostbusters and have shown how the movie can be recreated albeit, in your head, in a day of travel:
Annnnnd, something new just got added to the bucket list, ladies and gents.
Straight up, Community is the best sitcom on television. And it might actually just be the best show in general as well. It's funny, self-aware, smart, and fun all at the same time. Please check it out, you'll be doing yourself a favor. Sure, you might be a little lost at first, but give it a couple episodes and see if there isn't something you can't enjoy from it, because I guarantee you there is.
This article could have gone an entirely different way. If this show had been cancelled I would have spent the rest of my life quietly putting down those that I came across who never watched the show or worst, had never heard of it. Sure, you'll watch the friggin' Voice, but not one of the best written shows to grace the airwaves.
Just remember, if Community dies: I BLAME YOU!
Does YOUR favorite show have a claymation Christmas special episode?
I can't put my finger on it, but there's just something about the first video that's both haunting and interesting, while the second video just so brilliantly pokes fun at all the pretentiousness of the same things that I find so intriguing.
Odd...but I can't stop watching...so I'm sharing my pain. Enjoy!
So I've been busy as of late...too busy to report what I did on May 3rd.
Truth be told, I spent my day in Downtown Disney in Anaheim watching movies from 11:30am to well past 2:00am in the morning. It was, in the words of Barney Stinson: LEGENDARY.
I went into this thing thinking that there would be a relatively small crowd there. Figured two theater's almost full TOPS.
Couldn't have been more wrong.
I was assaulted with people that had been in line since the night before and AMC had FOUR theaters containing enough people to damn near full capacity. And boy oh boy, were these people enthusiastic.
I had a plan of attack where me and my friends would take our meager seats down in front and slowly, if not surely wear out the weaker, geekier folk throughout the day and gradually gain seats higher within the realm of AMC. Because if there's one thing I pride myself on it is my endurance. I can take PAIN, baby. I can hold my bladder longer than you, I can make it so to the point where I don't take a shit for DAYS, I have a CAST IRON stomach, I can sit and watch something FOREVER, I don't have to eat - EVER, and I can generally beat your ass if it comes to a conflict over seats and or noise level within a movie theater.
But holy jeezuz did I underestimate this geek crowd.
It was seriously like nothing I have ever seen.
Comic-Con takes place in my back yard, I thought I was prepared. I thought I was ready. I thought I had everything figured out.
Well, I was wrong and I was right.
The fact is that anyone with decent seats was doing exactly what I would've done, they were going out in organized parties, letting one or two individuals secure their seats while they were gone. I knew this would happen, my only miscalculation was that I didn't think they'd all have the stamina within FOUR THEATERS to keep their guard up continuously. I anticipated a break somewhere within the third or fourth movie that never came.
Add to this my horror to find out that between each movie there was at least a half hour gap and between Hulk and Thor there were hour long breaks which gave every geek in the world enough stamina to keep going.
When it became apparent with the first two movies that people weren't going ANYWHERE, I figured later on I'd do a sweep of the theater's and find something...LMAO...again, I underestimated the people I was dealing with.
My saving grace?
Because our seats were nothing special, my friends and I were allowed to enjoy our time with food and drink and our individual form of merry (much like the Avengers themselves) and always be able to come back to our not so-spectacular seats.
As the movies went on, I began to MARVEL (heh) at how much fun we were having AND at how easy this marathon was. I'm the KING of marathon's...you name it, I've done it (mayhap we'll do a challenge one day) and I went into this one thinking it might be somewhat tough.
WRONG.
Easiest marathon I've ever done. I think this was partly due to the fact that the Marvel movies are so different from each other and yet so much fun. But I also think there's something to be said about doing a marathon in a movie theater. There are ZERO distractions.
When you're in your own home, you can be distracted constantly, and it makes focusing on a movie hard - at least sometimes. But when you're in the beautiful, almost enchanting atmosphere of a large theatre all distractions tend to go by the way side.
As the movies went on, I kept doing intermittent sweeps of the theaters, hoping to find that ONE group that left in the middle of Thor because either they couldn't take it or they just thought it was safe to leave their seats by that point...TO NO AVAIL.
Our seats weren't horrible...to be honest I became more and more happy with them as the day wore on. Almost as if I'd taken ownership of these mini-Captain chairs and was now thus squarely-fitted on a throne that might not be perfect but was indeed GOOD ENOUGH.
Plus I was having fun, and enjoying the movies, the food (Downtown Disney being at my leisure) and the drinks.
However, there was one last tactic I had to play.
As much as I was OKAY with these seats for movies that I had seen before, I was absolutely NOT okay with watching the Avengers in these seats. I wanted better...we DESERVED better. So I told my friends by the ending of Iron Man 2 that if worse came to worst, I had a final, horrible plan.
You see the Marvel Movie Marathon was only open in FOUR theaters. But the Midnight Avengers showing would of course be played on all the remaining screens. Since we were on one wing, I knew a whole other wing would open around 11:00pm and there would be fresh seats waiting for the pro-active.
The trick was either getting past the ticket-stub attendant who would surely be guarding said wing, OR finding a broken link in the chain and perhaps getting into the theater's before they were even set-up for the Avengers fanatics - I mean fans.
Well, lo-and-behold, I found another way.
Part instinct, part reaction, part confidence and part destiny provided the path unto the great BatSTUD. On a sort of reconnaissance excursion, I happened to find the elevator used mostly for handicap persons that was surprisingly on MY wing. Upon taking it to the upper level it led to the opposite side of the building to the opposite wing which was just then opening new theaters for the Avengers midnight showing.
Thus I was able to select FOUR very decent seats for myself and my friends.
The rest is history. I watched the Avengers, I was awed. And my friends and I had decent seats. It became the perfect day. Exactly what I set out for: quality friends, good food, good drinks, great movies, decent seats for the most important movie, and brilliantly devised tactics all rolled into one.
So this article contains massive spoilers for the movie. If you have not seen it yet, turn away now.
Last warning.
OK, so in case you didn't notice...there was a scene in the Avengers that had the team heavily bickering with each other. It took place just after Black Widow found out that Loki planned to use the Hulk to help him throw shit at the proverbial fan. Everything was really heated, and everyone seemed to be affected by SOMETHING.
Loki's staff was glowing, and that seemed to be the cause.
But let's take a closer look at Loki's staff, and why maybe THAT would have affected everyone in the room:
Looks like a BLUE GEM in that staff.
Who gave Loki that staff?
Thanos, right? Well, what is Thanos ultimately interested in but the Infinity Gauntlet.
The BLUE GEM of the Infinity Gauntlet has the power over the MIND.
Don't take my word for it, check this out: Infinity Gems
The challenge of this review will be to attempt to bottle up my bursting at the seams enthusiasm and insane joy and love for this movie. So basically:
OH MY FRAKKING GOD THIS MOVIE IS AWESOME!
I'm gonna be 31 in June, so it needs to be noted that I remember a time when comic book adaptations (and any adaptations for that matter) were not handled with care or respect for the source material. In the last decade in a half, things have gotten much better. But for every Spider-Man 2 there is a Catwoman and Green Lantern. So it's obviously not perfect, but my sincere hope is that the Avengers will show Hollywood unequivocally that this is how it's supposed to be done.
Hollywood's 80's idea of the Avengers...
From start to finish, this is an extremely fun and well-crafted flick. It's funny, smart, hip, interesting, enjoyable, and always entertaining. It's a massive steroid shot of excitement that serves to totally remind us this is why we go to the movies. I've already seen it three times with all intentions of seeing it again. And maybe again.
That's not to say it's dumb fun, quite the contrary. If you want dumb fun, Battleship is about to come out...have idiotic fun with that (I won't be bothering, FYI). Actually, the Avengers is an extremely cerebral movie. It has to be in order to retain all the excitement and yet still contain interesting, fleshed-out characters, smart, witty dialogue and an interesting story with a pace that doesn't stop moving without making you feel lost.
For all intents and purposes this movie should not exist. And if it did, it should look something like the image above. The fact that we got such a faithful interpretation while being so vastly enjoyable is simply astounding. Shocking, even. As in the kind of shock you suffer that can kill you!
In case you've been living under a rock, I will tell you very briefly what this movie is about. Within the Marvel world there is an artifact known as the Tesseract or the Cosmic Cube which is a source of great power but also a big unknown in terms of what it really was made for, what it can do and where it came from. SHIELD is a Government agency that is like the FBI for extreme, paranormal, supernatural and other worldly threats. They have the cube and they've been keeping an eye on Earth's mightiest heroes (Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, Hulk, etc.) when Loki, the brother of Thor comes calling to collect the Cube with claims that he has an army ready to commit war upon the planet. SHIELD assembles the Avengers in due time and the fun begins.
Again, unless you live under a rock, you should be aware that Marvel has been producing superhero movies since 2008 to introduce individual characters from the Avengers with the sole express mission of putting them together into one movie. This movie.
The idea of putting all of these grandiose characters together was a daunting one. Many didn't think it would work. Personally, I always knew it would. For two reasons:
1. It works in the comics...and whatever works on the page will work on the screen.
2. Joss Whedon was hired to write and direct the Avengers.
I've been a massive Whedon fan for years. Ever since Buffy the Vampire Slayer came bursting onto television sets kicking ass and taking names with a little stake called Mr. Pointy. Most people write off Whedon once they hear that he was the mastermind behind works like Buffy and Angel (not to mention Firefly/Serenity). I've always felt that's highly ignorant. Regardless of whether this is your THING or not, if you just gave the show a chance and watched a couple episodes, you would at least see the genius of Whedon and why people fall in love with his shows. He writes genuinely real and interesting characters while weaving stories that are tragic, happy, fun, touching, serious, and inspiring all at once. The man is a master of handling ensembles and because he understands his characters so well, can write their dialogue in a very satisfying way. I cannot speak more highly of the man and I've been waiting for him to have an audience large enough to finally show his power and talents on the grand scale.
And so the master has arrived and hopefully schooled some of the morons within the industry. Meaning maybe now he'll get some proper goddamn respect.
BADASS
Bringing together these characters and this story could not have been easy, yet nothing about the film feels heavy-handed or awkward. Indeed, the characters don't generally like all of each other when our story begins. It's not a seething hatred, but there are some interesting ego's at play here that don't initially vibe.
They all sort of think THEY are the best hero in the room, 'who are these other guys and why do we need them?' With the exception of Tony Stark and his outlook towards Bruce Banner (who form a very quick, likable and easy-going friendship) not everyone is happy having to be in the same room with each other. But as the story unfolds and everyone is forced to rely on each other, an unspoken respect and bond starts to emerge and these very individual people start to work as a team. It's really quite thrilling to see Thor and Hulk battle a giant monster or to watch Iron Man have Captain America's back only to soar upwards and protect Hawkeye as he snipes targets - all within one tracking shot btw.
By the time we reach the end of the film (about two and a half hours deep without even feeling it), there has been death, sacrifice, heroics, conspiracy, and intrigue, but the Avengers stand strong. It's entertaining and highly satisfying. Between the one-liner's (Hulk's, "Puny God" might be the best), the character interaction and what they do and how they do it, Whedon GET'S it and get's it done RIGHT.
I remember worrying that the balance wouldn't be right. Hawkeye and Black Widow would get left out in the cold while Iron Man got too much time because it's Robert Downey Jr. as Iron Man. But unbelievably, everyone get's their shot and their time to shine...and it feels effortless. Sure Iron Man get's a lot of play here, but it works and it's not at the sacrifice of any other character. It makes sense in the scenes why Iron Man is the focus when he is the focus, just like it does for any other character. Black Widow was pleasantly surprising in that I've always found her kind of boring, but in the flick she has some great scenes and interaction with ALL of the characters. She sort of centers the movie and Scarlett Johansson really stepped it up. She doesn't get lost among the big boys at all, she's here to play, and in many ways, outshines the guys. This being a Whedon project (who always loves putting strong women on screen), I should not have been surprised.
For that matter, there's been a lot of good comments about Mark Ruffalo as Bruce Banner/the Hulk. And while I agree, and always thought Ruffalo was a good choice, the comments are something like, "I really liked that guy as the Hulk, he might be the best yet." OR, "I wish Norton had come back, but he did a good job." - I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS. The truth is that most people no nothing about how Bruce Banner should be portrayed or whether a portrayal is accurate or not. Not to mention, who cares how Banner is portrayed or who he's portrayed by? I wanna see the Hulk...and the Hulk is CGI, so I find these comments completely unnecessary and slightly ridiculous. It's just a bit bizarre that I keep hearing this, and I almost want to counter with, so tell me a bit about what you know of Banner and how he should be played?
But who can sum up negativity in the face of something like this:
There is a scene where the Avengers are finally coming together and Captain America starts handing out orders...I seriously could have died and been okay with it. Something that I thought I would never see has come to pass.
My ONLY complaints are so minor I barely have the energy to type them out. In the flick, Nick Fury, leader of SHIELD has to answer to a shady, unnamed American council that is constantly undermining him and showing up to be annoying because it really doesn't make sense that a handful of politicians would have any say or control into an organization like SHIELD. The only good thing I can say about the scenes with these idiots is that they make a decision towards the end of the movie that plays out like a real world twist that you didn't really see coming in a story that has a giant green man leaping from building to building. Let's just put it this way, if an alien invasion started happening, how would our military really respond?
Tracking on this movie always had it as being a huge success, but man, oh man, I have never seen such positivity towards a film. No one has anything bad to say about it. As the reviews continue to sweep in they are outstandingly great, no not great, amazing, no not amazing...PHENOMENAL. Not only is this movie making tons of money, but it's making people happy and bringing them back to the theater's for multiple viewings. The continually growing positive reaction over this film coupled with the fact that it really is a good movie just blows me down. Amazing!
As for the end-credit sequences. The first is actually a MID-credit sequence and set's up the future of the franchise, with the second being an actual end-credit scene and more of a fun team moment. I really loved the end-credit sequence but if you stay for it, don't expect anything huge. There's no dialogue and it's just a cute little ending to the movie. The mid-credit sequence is another story. Stick around for that and ask a buddy who that was.
Relying on advertising must be for some companies a necessary evil. Personally, I feel that most companies don't need to spend the millions they do on advertising, but unfortunately for the cause of film, the studios MUST advertise. We all know Coke is out there and we pretty much drink whatever the restaurant has or grab what ever is available, but are we always aware of what's coming to theater's?
What's unfortunate is when the advertisements fail in every way to both successfully sell the film but also tell the audience what it is.
This is what happened to the Raven. It was undersold and possibly misunderstood therefore sold to the wrong demographic and showcased in a way that makes no sense upon seeing the actual film. While it's not a phenomenal movie by any means, it's way better than you've heard and a generally entertaining flick that see's John Cusack actually trying for the first time in years.
The Raven is a fictional account of Edgar Allan Poe's last few days amongst the living. In reality, Poe's death has always been a bit of mystery, filled with baffling third-party and so-called eye witness accounts as well as a more than healthy air of intrigue and suspicion that has more to do with the romance of his writing than what probably happened to him. In the film, a serial killer is using Poe's story as a twisted modus operandi and has the police at a loss. Poe is called in to help them understand what's going on and maybe prevent a murder or two. The case becomes even more personal for Poe when his beloved fiance' is kidnapped by the killer.
I remember when Sherlock Holmes (2009) came out and there was a bit of a hubbub in Hollywood over the idea of taking famous historical and literary characters and turning them into action heroes. I can't be certain, but I believe reading that this is sort of how the Raven came into play. Give Edgar Allan Poe the Downey Jr. Sherlock Holmes makeover.
Whether or not this was the true genesis of the Raven, the fact is that the movie was sort of sold like an action-flick. Like a darker version of Sherlock Holmes.
Nothing could be farther from the truth. If the movie was anything like it appears in ads and it's trailers, I probably would not have enjoyed it. So let me tell you how it really is since the advertisement company that was PAID to tell you failed so horribly and obnoxiously.
First off, this movie has more in common with Seven than anything else made in recent production. I only bring this up to securely distant the film from the look and feel of how it was presented. Secondly, the movie does not shy away from Poe and actually pays the man many respects. He is NOT an action hero. He doesn't get the call from the police and swagger in to danger guns blazing. The dude is a poor, tormented, alcoholic writer. For most of the movie, Poe doesn't want to be involved with any of the proceedings, he's out of his depth and completely lost as to why he's even involved. Even when the love of his life is kidnapped, you don't see Poe turn into something he's not. He's the same sad, tragic character who just happens to be facing a dire threat. He doesn't turn into John McClane. You can tell this is a part and a person that Cusack actually cares about since he gives his most enthusiastic performance in years, possibly even decades? It's actually refreshing but also a bit ironic to see him come to life portraying a character that's drinking his way to death.
Having 2:30 ads featuring only Alice Eve would have been a better way to sell the movie than what was chosen.
A lot of effort has been put into focusing on the non-historical elements of the Raven. But this is funny because the movie attempts to remain faithful to Poe and his life so much, that you could believe that IF the premise actually happened, THIS is how it would have happened. Making the ending so much more tragic because of how it lines up with what we KNOW happened to Poe in his last moments.
Ultimately, we have yet another case of mistaken identity. The Raven is a solid flick that is an interesting historical what if and not a rousing action-adventure that treats Poe like someone he wasn't. I blame the failure of this movie on the wrongful impression it's advertising gave the audience AND on the almost gaily negative reviews that took pride in destroying a film that wasn't even bad. You see this often with critic's. Blood in the water, and all that...
