Our lives would be so much cooler:

IF OUR CARS WERE TRANSFORMERS!!!

Imagine how much fun your life would be if your car was an intergalactic alien with sentient intelligence that could not only drive itself, but become a relatable person that you could talk to and grow with and that would inevitably look out for your best interests and protect you.

Your car would not only be instantly cooler than it already is, but it'd be able to shoot lasers and spout awesome dialogue like, "Autobots, ROLL OUT." 

That would be awesome and you know it. It's like taking K.I.T. to the next level, because while KIT was amazing, he couldn't transform.

K.I.T. for those who don't know...i.e. LAME!

Having a Decepticon or Autobot as your vehicle would also tell others LOADS about you. These are kind of dividing-line archetypes we're talking about here. Classic good versus evil kind of stuff. Just the other day I saw an asshat with a Decepticon sticker on his car and he instantly stood out as an evil mother fucker. While he might not have been EVIL...he's probably not the nicest guy in the world if he's relating to fucking Decepticons. There was a split-second where my instinct was to run him off the road...

I think this was the soul of my Autobot car speaking to me. For just an instant...

Ironhide and I are very close...

I'm getting off-track here...who'd have thought, right? But personality would play a large part in what kind of Transformer you'd get. A great example here would be DOUCHEBAGS! Obviously douchebags have a way of projecting who and what they are by what they wear and how they act (to which I am eternally grateful for), but this would be just one more thing!

Why was I late today? Oh, well some douchebag sped up on my ass (even though I was driving a very respectable 70 MPH and traffic was pretty even) and when he started switching lanes needlessly, my Autobot friend got a good look at the Decepticon vehicle he was driving and initiated attack formation Beta-Delta. A fight ensued. Needless to say the douchebag is dead and the Decepticon is a heaping pile of twisted metal (see what I did there?).

Ah, the applications are mouth-watering. Science, get on this. Who says we have to find Transformers amongst the stars? Let's INVENT Transformers. Insert artificial intelligence into transforming cars NOW! I want my next best friend to be called Optimus Prime!

Sure, there would be an increase in violence across the planet but it would be the RIGHTEOUS kind of violence that weeds out evil and annoying assholes. Plus there would be laser guns shooting all over the place! Hell, the planet is overpopulated as it is, and if the Transformers took their completely black and white approach to good versus evil I would NOT be opposed to some middle-of-the-road bad guy's getting their butt's handed to them in the process of the Decepticons getting wiped the Hell out.

This is what I like to call: WIN-WIN violence. The 80's style of violence. Woot.

God forgive me, I just said "woot".

In the end, what do we have? Tons of awesomeness + Cool robots to hang out with + Cars driving themselves (NAP TIME) - Massive collateral damage / Evil being taken out =

TOTAL FUCKING WIN

Seriously...this is RAD.